Off

We're off to Virginia tomorrow for 10 days... woo hoo! I've been packing and writing lists today. I'm looking forward to lots of family time and hanging out while we're there, and Jon and I also have a two-night trip planned to Williamsburg (the children will stay with my parents). Here are some pictures before we go.

Lucy thinks she is hilarious when she puts on glasses or hats.




Jon and I found this paper that Nate had drawn on. I've never seen him be able to do circles before. The second picture is him showing the paper and being very proud. :)

Helpers

Nate had a lot of fun this morning helping me clean. I sprayed the glass cleaner on the mirrors, and he wiped. Then, he got to dust (Swiffer dusters are great). Most exciting, he got to vacuum the floor underneath his chair at the dining table with the hose extension. (This was especially gratifying for him, I'm sure, as there was a mountain of crumbs down there, as usual.)

Then this afternoon, Lucy emptied the clothes from the dryer into the basket.



It takes a lot longer to clean with "helpers," but it sure is so much more fun.

Today

My friend Casey watched Lucy for me this morning while I went to school with Nate and helped in his morning class (SDC) from 8:30 to 10:45. Let's just say I wish I'd had time for some coffee first! :) It was fun seeing Nate in his element. Today was his turn to count the days/numbers on the class calendar, pointing with a little paintbrush stick, and that was very cute. He is getting to know all of the songs they sing and adjusting to their daily schedule. One of the boys in there, in particular, is very verbal, seems to have no behaviors, and is about 4 and a 1/2 (and also extremely cute), and I was glad to see that Nate is seated next to him in circle time (don't know if it's always that way or not). It was a fun morning.

Adjusting to school

The title of my post is not really talking about Nate but about me! Surprisingly, Nate has made the transition to big boy school very well. He still likes it every day and isn't having major meltdowns at home like I thought he might (after having spent half the day "holding it all in" at school). The adjustment has really been for me--trying to figure out how to organize my day and week, since everything is different now. I'm getting into a new groove, though, and I like it.

Nate spends time every day talking about things he is looking forward to. Right now those things are riding in a big airplane (for our trip to VA) and riding the school bus. (The school bus thing is slated to start on June 30, when he would be riding just in the mornings, but we might change our minds about this and just keep driving him. I'm sad that this would disappoint him, but we'll see.) To help him understand when fun things are going to happen, I got a calendar with big numbers. He can help me change out the month and the numbers each month, and then on event days, we'll put on a special label. For May, you can see his birthday and our airplane trip:



He also knows a song with the days of the week (just start on Sunday and sing all the days through twice to the tune of "Oh my darlin' Clementine"), and the calendar will help him figure those out too.

Here are a couple of pictures from last night, when he and I were laughing at how his pants looked:

Comedian

Lucy and I always share a lunch at the mall food court on Sundays after church. She eats an entire half of a sandwich and some of my tomato soup. When we laughed at how she kept the spoon in her mouth yesterday, she kept doing it over and over and scrunching up her face to look even funnier.

Art

Ricci gave me the idea a while back about keeping a "digital copy" of all of Nate's artwork but not having to keep every single piece of paper he brings home. I just started putting this idea to use, as Nate's backpack seems filled with stuff every day he comes home.

This picture is from his first day at school. I love how happy he looks.



No amazing artistry yet, but it's fun to have a record. :)

I am not joking

Do you remember how I started the "I'm serious about losing those last 10 pounds" commitment several weeks back? And how I only posted about it for the first couple of weeks? I'm usually a very committed person; when I set out to do something, I stick with it. So what happened this time? I'll tell you: the day after I posted my first update, I found out that I'm pregnant! I had my first appointment last week. I'm 9 weeks along today and am due December 15. Jon's reaction when I told him was to laugh for about 10 minutes straight. This was not in "our plan," but I'm glad it was in God's. I'm feeling pretty good--just super tired. Crazy!

Jon's pics

Here are some cute pictures Jon took on his phone in the past couple of months:

Nate going on the train at the Spectrum--this is the only time he has done it, though he asks every time! He loved it. Below the pictures is the video.







Me at the end of March, when we went on our church's couples retreat to Big Bear. Jon and I went on the Alpine Slide--I'm waiting at the top for our turn.



And Jake and Lucy when we went to dinner with the Eichlers recently. He kept feeding Lucy his food.

School and... work?

Nate has been going to school every day this week, and it is going well so far. I picked him up early (12:00) on Monday and Tuesday, but today I'm letting him stay the full time, 8:30-1:30. I think that timing will be an adjustment (a long day for him), but I also think he's having a good time. When I picked him up yesterday, he announced that he had cut with scissors and played soccer (that is some pretty good spontaneous language for him). He also, of course, loves recess.

I also have another update that I've been meaning to write about, but it happened so quickly that I never got a chance. Jon's company works with a graphics design studio in Long Beach, and he mentioned to them that I do freelance editing. They immediately asked for my resume and scheduled an interview within a couple of days. I went up there, interviewed and took a proofreading test, and they offered me a part-time, work-from-home job a couple of days later. So I'm now going to be doing about 10 hours/week of editing/proofreading, mostly from home. (I went in a few half days this week to train, coordinating childcare with family members, but the company, Vision Design Studio, knows I won't be coming into the office more than once a month for a half day.) It's just cool to be able to do something I love (editing) from home that won't take away from being a mom.

Lucy's stats

I took Lucy to her 12-month check-up (yes, a month late) on Thursday. Here are her stats:

18 pounds (5th percentile!)
29.5 inches tall (50th percentile)
17.5 inches head (25th percentile)

We have a tall and thin girl! The doctor asked if she says one or two words, and I thought about it--she says several.

Ball="ba"
Book="buh"
Daddy="daaaa-DEE!"
Mama="______" (still has never said it)
Drink="dee"
Bubbles="bubba"
Bye="ba ba" while waving

I think she's just starting to say a consistent word for "Nate."

and my favorite:
Flower="wawoof"

Some pictures

First day

I wish I had thought to bring the camera this morning for Nate's first day of "big boy school." I dropped him off at 8:30 with his new teacher, and he seemed excited/curious about what was going on--no tears. I must admit, though, that I got a little teary watching him walk away while holding hands with another little boy on one side and his teacher on the other. I hope he's having fun!

Party

We had family over for Nate's birthday last night. Jon grilled hamburgers and hot dogs, and Nate ate his "happy birthday cake," which he has been talking about ever since Lucy's party a month ago. :) When we mentioned on Wednesday night that he would also be getting a few presents on his birthday, he nearly fell over with excitement--he had no idea. He got some clothes and lots of new toy cars, which I had mentioned since he didn't have any. Jon got himself Nate a remote control truck. It was a fun evening!

Lucy walking

Here's a video of Lucy doing some walking. She is consistently taking 20+ steps.

Nate

Yesterday, I brought all the paperwork to La Tierra to register Nate. To my surprise, they put up absolutely no fuss about his not having any immunizations after 18 months. I had brought a letter that included some of the state law that he can't be denied entrance into the school, but I didn't have to bring it out; I just signed their exemption request. Woo hoo! He starts this Friday, May 2.

Tomorrow is his birthday! Three years old... I can barely believe it. I'm going to run by the store today to get birthday candles and the ingredients to make an easy cake (for everyone else to eat; I still have frozen leftovers of the GFCF cake for Nate).

Holding hands

I turned around in the kitchen tonight and saw this. Nate had the proudest, cutest smile on his face showing me that he was holding Lucy's hand and leading her (sometimes a bit fast!).

Bible story

Quite a few months ago, Jon started telling Nate a Bible story every night at bed time. He started asking for them before nap time too, so I tell him one then, though I'm not as good a story teller. For the past several weeks (at least), Nate asks specifically for the story of Adam and Eve. (I think he likes the predictability of the same story each time.) He knows the story well now, and I tell it almost the same way each time, so he can complete some of my sentences.

• We start the story with Genesis 1:1, which he has memorized: "In da beginning, God cweated da heavens and da earf!"
• God decided that Adam needed a "help-Nate."
• God told Adam and Eve not to eat from the tree of "knowledge of good and eeeevil."
• After they ate the fruit, they realized they had sinned, and they were ashamed, which means they were "vewy vewy sad and guilty."

So cute!

This morning

Full IEP report

Is it really Thursday already? I meant to write an update yesterday about the IEP meeting, but I spent all of my computer time listening to our recording of the meeting and writing detailed notes. I'm going to send those notes to the school district so they can include them on the IEP as an addendum.

The meeting and all in attendance were very pleasant. Afterwards, I wished I would have been a little stronger in resisting their putting Nate in the IBI tutoring, but I realized too that he probably still will do well in there, and if he doesn't, we can call another meeting.

Here are just some of my notes (with additional comments in grey). This is long, and it isn't even everything!

- We went over the few minor changes necessary in the assessments (just factual).

- Next, we went over the proposed goals:

• Occupational therapy (vestibular, grasping/drawing, tactile)
  Will use gluten-free products
• Speech/language
  Answering a variety of “wh” questions/functional language
  I asked about a goal for reducing Nate’s echolalia. The SLP said they usually don’t write a specific goal for that--usually it’s an elimination process because the child is comprehending more, and the echolalia decreases on its own.
• Cognitive skills and pre-academic
  The psychologist noted that these skills are on par for Nate’s age expectancy; she wrote goals to keep him moving along.
• Adaptive physical education
  Nate doesn't qualify for individual services for APE, but we included two related goals--using the pedals on a tricycle and learning playground games like red light green light.
• Social goals (initiating play, increase play repertoire)
• Other goal parents brought up but that was not included:
  Self-monitoring of his special diet. Psychologist and speech and language pathologist noted it was particularly difficult to write any sort of goal for this, especially because there aren’t any natural opportunities for choosing different foods at school besides what the child brings.

- Offer of program and parent response

• Special day class 8:30-10:45 five days/week
• IBI tutoring 10:45-1:30 five days/week
  I noted that the we loved the SDC—the kids were talking to each other, interacting (things Nate needs to work on), and we liked the teacher. I noted that the IBI setting did not seem this way. The kids were not interacting, and there were many more apparent behaviors. I asked, “How is he going to work on talking with other kids if the other kids don’t talk?” The district preschool program specialist answered that the SDC feels natural, much like a typical preschool; she said the IBI clinic feels more sterile and is run a little differently—it’s highly structured and they’re really focusing on goals and objectives. She said that, because it is structured with so much adult support, kids really are able to make progress toward goals, especially abstract, social skills. (Hmmm, did this really answer my question? No!)
  She continued by saying that IBI is an autism-specific class, so the kids in there do have language delays and difficulty with socialization. (She was saying this means they really do focus on the language and socialization in there, but in my mind I'm thinking, "Exactly! They have problems with those things! So how will Nate be able to interact with them?")
  The psychologist noted that the IBI tutoring we observed was the 4-year-olds class, but that the 3-year-olds IBI tutoring class has a "different ambience." I asked, then, if Nate were to meet this year’s goals, would he not be in the 4-year-old IBI? She answered that most kids do continue in the IBI—just his goals would be changing. (Another answer I didn't like. If she was confirming that I shouldn't have been comfortable with how bad the 4-year-old IBI looked, then why would it be good for Nate to be in there when he is 4?)
  The psych mentioned the mock Kindergarten program and other opportunities for inclusion and socialization/peer interaction for when kids turn 4. I asked would Nate be able to be in that mock K if he accomplishes these goals, or would we need to add more goals in order for him to be in the mock K? The psych answered that that is the goal; the SLP confirmed it is what we would anticipate, and the psych said that he is on target toward it. Jon and I noted that the mock K is what we want to shoot for.
  I said that our main concern with Nate and the IBI is that his trouble is interacting not with other children with autism but interacting with typical peers, so we are hoping for as much exposure as possible to those typical peers that is appropriate. This is the area we see him struggling the most. The SLP responded that the theory is to teach them in the smaller group so he can gain the skills, even if it’s rote, and he can generalize to the special day class. More practice, less intensive teaching. (Overall, I am not happy with their responses to my questions about typical peer exposure, since they just talked around the issue and didn't really address our concerns.)
• Group speech 15 minutes/week (this is basically nothing)
• Occupational therapy direct service 30 minutes/week
• Occupational therapy group 2x/month (with class)
  

- We talked about a transition plan; Nate will go at least the first few days (or week, or as long as I think it's needed) from 8:30-12:00 instead of all the way to 1:30. This means he'll be in the special day class until 10:45, then do lunch with the IBI class, then do recess, which ends at 12:00.

- We also discussed extended school year. Nate will attend the summer program, which ends July 25, but he will not have services in August. I pushed on this one for a while, but the only group-type program they have in August is for severely impaired children, so that wouldn't work for Nate.

Once I turn in our signed IEP and the registration packet, Nate will be starting next Friday, May 2!

IEP

We had the meeting today, and it went very well. I'm feeling sick right now (caught a really sore throat/stuffy nose/headache thing), so I'll write details soon!

Diet update

I was just reading through old posts and found the one about starting Nate on the GFCF diet. I wrote about how he had a meltdown when everyone else had pizza and he couldn't have any. That got me thinking about how extremely well he is doing with the diet now but that I haven't written about it here. When Nate wants to eat something in particular, but I say, "I'm sorry, but you can't have that. It has gluten [and/or casein] in it," he now responds by saying, "Gluten casein hurt the tummy." Then he moves on, not begging for the food or getting upset that he can't have it. If we are out and Lucy has pizza, he simply points out that it is Lucy's pizza, but he doesn't ask for any. He is starting to recognize which common items, like breads, crackers, and cookies, have gluten. It is so nice that he has become so compliant and go-with-the-flow in this area. I think part of it is that all the gluten and casein (and soy) are out of his system, so 1) his body doesn't have those addictions anymore and 2) he forgets what the foods taste like (and that he loved them so much).

This diet has been the best change we could have made for Nate.

Weight loss update week 2

I can't blame another slow week on the time during the month, can I? Looks like another half pound this week. Keeping at this pace obviously won't get me to 10 pounds in 6 more weeks, but I'll keep plugging away. (Note: I did not exercise this week beyond normal playing with the kids. Will try for more next week.)

Potty training update

I am extremely surprised at how potty training has turned into a non-issue. After the first three or four days, once I finally figured out what worked for Nate, it just turned into the new normal. I had to figure out that "making" him go every half hour, hour, or whatever didn't work because he doesn't like being told what to do. (OK, most children don't, and I do still tell Nate what to do, but in this situation it was just making him upset and wasn't getting the goal accomplished.) Here is what worked for him:

• Going without pants for a few days helped him figure out the feeling of needing to go.
• Once he figured out that feeling, he usually ran to the bathroom by himself (I'd follow).
• No rewards have been needed except for lots of praise.
• I figured out he can "hold it" for quite a long time (at least a couple of hours), so I don't need to prompt him very often to go--usually just before we leave for somewhere and after we get home.
• When he is in others' care (like in the nursery or at therapy), I tell the caregivers to ask him every once in a while if he needs to go. This seems to work fine, since he still has not quite gotten that he needs to tell someone before he goes.

He is now waking up dry after naps and in the mornings (I'm telling you--total non-issue!), though I still haven't braved putting just underwear on him overnight. :)

Lucy

Lucy started signing "please" this week--it's her first sign. She has also started saying "dee" for drink/cup. This morning, she said, "Dee!" and then signed please. Go Lucy!

Here's a video of her the other day dancing to an old VBS video.

Classroom observation

Jon and I went to La Tierra this morning to observe the possible placements for Nate. I must say that I was pleasantly surprised by the special day class. The class size was good (about 8 children to one teacher with one assistant), and I saw no behaviors, acting out, or stimming going on. Some of the kids were talking to each other and interacting. I think Nate would do well in there. The small group IBI setting (where they have stations set up with two to three children per therapist and they supposedly work very specifically on each child's goals) wasn't as pleasing, though: it was a bit chaotic feeling in there, the children seemed to have more issues, and the therapists weren't interacting very well with the kids. I'll have to think more about that one.

After having gone today, I am actually less sure about what I'd like to ask for for Nate. Before, when I thought the SDC was going to be full of lower functioning kids, I was against it. Now, when I see that it has some good components, I'm not sure.

Weekend pics

Observation

Two people from the school district went to Cornerstone this morning to observe Nate as part of the district's assessments of him. They attended Group for the first hour or so and saw Nate in the song time and in the first small group session, where he had speech today. I was not there, as Grampy drove Nate to therapy this morning, but I got a full report from Will.

I had been a little concerned that the observers (the school psychologist and the speech/language pathologist who originally evaluated Nate) were going to be observing him on a Friday, because 1) he is often tired by the end of the week and seems to pay less attention at Group and 2) his shadow on Fridays isn't Will; it's someone else who doesn't do a very good job of redirecting Nate if he gets distracted or whatever. However, Will said that Nate did an awesome job--he sang all the songs (sometimes on Fridays he zones out/stops singing by the end of song time, which is about 25 minutes), answered all the questions the song leader called out, raised his hand to volunteer for things, and participated very well. Will said the observers asked him (Will) a few questions, and they asked something like, "How are we even going to come up with areas for improvement for him?"

It sounds like a great morning. I'm hopeful it will add some ammunition to my argument that Nate shouldn't be put in the special day class.

Bad habits starting early?

Before I dive into some editing, I wanted to share this cute story from yesterday.

Yesterday morning, Nate found the unopened apple juice container on the counter and asked for some juice. I told him that one was warm but the one in the refrigerator was cold, so I poured him some from the opened container.

Fast forward to the end of the day, around 7:00 p.m. He ran into the kitchen and said, "I want a cold one!"

Weight loss update

It's the end of week one!

Exercise one time? Check.

Eat more "intentionally" without unwise snacking (including no more finishing the kids' food)? Check.

Weight loss? Less than half a pound.

Huh? In my experience, the first week of purposefully eating better and exercising usually shows huge results because of water weight and whatnot, but not this time! I may have chosen a bad week during my month to begin, so I'm hoping next week will be much more fruitful.

If you are doing this "challenge" along with me, feel free to update your progress in the comments section.

Pics

I just have to post these pictures from today. I tried Lucy's birthday sunglasses on her (she wore them over her eyes for a couple of minutes) and caught these cute shots.

Party pics

Had a fun time at Lucy's party yesterday. She didn't get too much into her cake, but I suspect if I had made one out of bologna or some other meat (perhaps a meat loaf), she would have devoured it. :) Nate LOVED the GFCF "happy birthday cake," though.

Potty training: a parent's equivalent to "hell week"

It looks like potty training is upon us. I hadn't planned on starting right now; I guess I didn't know when I was going to start... just not now. I think maybe it's one of those things I was hoping would go away, you know? It would be great if there were such a thing as potty training camp, where you send your child away for a week and he comes back fully trained (nights included, of course).

Here's how this all started. On Thursday, when I picked Nate up from the older kid nursery at MOPS, the worker asked, "Is he potty trained?" I answered no. She said, "That's what I thought. But when all the other kids were saying they had to go to the bathroom, Nate said he did too. So I took him, and he went." ... Wha?

Then, after his nap that day, Nate said something about going on the potty, so I took off his diaper, and he went. OK! We went the rest of the day diaperless and pantsless. It included three accidents but also three or four successes. I diapered him for bed time, and he did have a dirty diaper when I checked on him later.

The next day, Friday, he had therapy. I didn't want to keep him home because I hate having him miss therapy, so I took him. I packed a bunch of extra clothes and underwear (he didn't want to wear the plastic training pants I have) and pinned a sign on his back saying he was potty training. In the three hours of therapy that morning, he had one accident and one success. During the rest of the day, he did very well when naked and had a couple of accidents with underwear on. Another dirty diaper after bed time.

This morning, when he was playing on the computer and not wearing any pants, he looked at me and said, "Uh oh!" I asked if he had to go, and he said yes, so I rushed him to the bathroom, where he had his first (excuse all the toilet talk) BM. He was soooo proud.

So that's where we are. We'll see how the rest of the weekend goes. We have Lucy's little b-day party at the park today, where there is no bathroom, so I'll probably bring our little plastic toilet and see if Nate will use it.

Sibling fun

It's one of the best things to see your children play well together. I especially love this video because of the last few seconds; Nate says, "I found you!"



P.S. The "big boy underwear" is a whole other post (coming soon), but suffice it to say I cannot believe I'm doing this.

Accountability

OK, it's time for me to lose the last few pounds of "Lucy weight" I'm holding onto. I have 5 pounds to go to get to my pre-Lucy-pregnancy weight, but 15 pounds to get to my pre-Nate-pregnancy weight. I realize I may never get back to that pre-Nate weight. So I would like to lose 10 pounds in the next 2 months, which is totally doable at just over 1 pound per week. I am writing about this here because now I will feel accountable to someone/something. I plan on re-aligning my eating lifestyle with the Weight Watchers philosophy and also exercising more--at least once this week, then up to 2 or 3 times a week in the next month. I took my "baseline weight" this morning, so I'll check in on the blog once a week on Thursdays. Here I go!

Kitchen Q&A

I'd like to start by saying that the colors are inspired by Ricci's new kitchen. :)

• Do you feed your kids something different than you and hubby eat? Same time or different? Sometimes I wish I could change this, but I feed them something different AND at a different time. Jon gets home too late from work, so I wait and eat with him. And I just haven't gotten talented enough to make one big meal that will work for everyone, including Nate's special diet.


• How many nights a week do you cook? Ga! Do I have to answer these incriminating questions? Actually cook a meal--probably 2 nights/week. Other nights are out with ministry (e.g., Awana), take out (probably 1 night/week), or something I think of as halfway cooking, like sandwiches or a frozen pizza.


• Do you follow a recipe exactly or improvise? The first time, I follow it exactly, and then I improvise in the future to our tastes.


• Do you cook and then do dishes before you eat or do it all after? Most dishes get done before we eat... usually.


• Does hubby or kids help in the kitchen? Nate helps empty the dishwasher, and Jon sometimes does the after-dinner dishes.


• How often do you try a new recipe? Once a month or less, but I want to be better about trying more.


• Do you try to use a sparing number of dishes to cook or say heck with it and dirty the whole kitchen? Sparing number.


• Do you plan a menu or cook on the fly? Although I've tried several times in the past to start figuring out weekly menus, I've never stuck with it. On the fly.


• How many nights is the TV on for dinner? Zero for the kids, almost all the time for Jon and me! We enjoy doing this together.


• Do you grocery shop once a week or several times? Oh, several times. I always need/want something from Trader Joe's, so I go there at least once or twice a week. The grocery store I have down to once a month or so. I also go to Mother's Market for Nate.


• Do you have more cookbooks than days in a week to use them? Yes! My favorites are my own recipe book with recipes from friends and family, and my Rachel Ray "Just in Time" cookbook.


• Which wins, good tasting or good for you, if you had to choose? Hmmm... For my eating personality, good for you. That way, I can eat a ton of it and not feel terrible about myself.


• Do you like to cook dinner or bake dessert better? Bake.


• How often do you cook breakfast for dinner in a month? Never, which is funny since I love it and Jon's favorite meal is breakfast. Time to get out the eggs and bacon!

Lucy is 1

Today is our sweet daughter's birthday. She gave me a present by staying in bed until 7:00 a.m.! :)

What a fun, cute, sweet baby Lucy is. Her favorite things are her brother, any of his toys, telephones/remote controls, and her daddy. Her favorite activities are eating meat, pointing to pictures of people she knows, cruising along the furniture (she just took one small step not holding onto anything last night, too!), crawling super speed to Jon when he gets home, and laughing when I ask her to say "Mama."

It feels like she has gained some weight this past month, which would be good, so we'll see about that at her doctor's appointment on Friday.

We're having a small get-together on Saturday at the park where we'll play and let Lucy eat cake. I ordered one from The Sensitive Baker--it's GFCF so Nate can have it too!









(The birthday girl today)

Refreshed

We had a great weekend in Big Bear on the marriage retreat. Eight other couples went, including all of our closest friends, so we had a great time going out to meals, talking, hanging out in the cabin, going on walks, etc. Jon and I went on the Alpine Slide--that was fun. We also found Pine Summit, the Christian camp where he went to AWANA scholarship camp as a kid. Perhaps the best part of the weekend was sleeping all night through 'til 8:00 or 9:00 a.m. two nights in a row. Woo hoo! :)

It's the little things

My best friend is coming over today to watch the kids while I go to get my hair done. I haven't gotten it done in about 4 months (longer for a cut), which, in the world of hair color, is a long time. I'm rrrrrrreally looking forward to it!